tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9238596.post3293929690216781768..comments2023-08-29T09:12:53.828-05:00Comments on OMIGOD ... I'm ThirtyWHAT?: I Know I Should Be Happy ... ThirtyWhathttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15013731537383431181noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9238596.post-75965172741425447242014-12-23T16:44:18.906-06:002014-12-23T16:44:18.906-06:00May you find the strength to move on. Good luck. I...May you find the strength to move on. Good luck. I know how hard the road away can be.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9238596.post-65902895589853971352014-12-23T16:33:40.802-06:002014-12-23T16:33:40.802-06:00When my friend first died, I had a friend on the W...When my friend first died, I had a friend on the West Coast that used to write me almost daily. She'd gone through almost the same thing ... <i>her</i> best friend died slowly and painfully from cancer ... and right after it happen, her widow became this completely different person ... spending her life insurance lavishly ... expecting everyone, including their children, to meet (and accept with open arms) the new girlfriend he'd met only a month or so after his wife died.<br /><br />So she told me to prepare myself ... that J and I wouldn't be friends in the near future. And told me to remember that, from his point of view, he wasn't doing anything wrong ... but from my point of view, everything happy and wonderful that happened would seem like a betrayal to my dead friend.<br /><br />At the same time, my Mom was telling me not to get my feeling hurt ... to remember that whatever woman he ended up with, she would most likely want nothing to do with Stoney or me. That we were part of J's "old world" ... and that she would want to incorporate him into "her world." And for the most part, that's been very true.<br /><br />We barely speak anymore ... although we're supposed to get together for Christmas ... and he's told people that I'm "his last tie to K." I can respect that ... but I can't keep hurting. I've been honest with him. About a year ago he asked if he was making me sad. I told him that I wanted him to be happy ... and I wanted him to KNOW that I wanted him to be happy. But likewise, I wanted him to know that I wasn't done grieving. So yes ... some of things he said <i>did</i> make me sad. Even after saying that, he can't stop sharing things I don't need or <i>want</i> to know.<br /><br />What it boils down is that you're right ... this relationship has about reached an end. We are about as disconnected as you can get while still speaking now and then. I feel ... not to be insensitive ... like I'm beating a dead horse at this point. He's going to keep bragging about this wonderful new life and all the amazing things they're doing ... and I think I just need to quit listening.ThirtyWhathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15013731537383431181noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9238596.post-50509990232806224702014-12-23T16:25:04.511-06:002014-12-23T16:25:04.511-06:00SIGH ... I keep trying to post and it keeps not pu...SIGH ... I keep trying to post and it keeps not publishing. UGH ... let's try this one more time ... ThirtyWhathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15013731537383431181noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9238596.post-11891973385113068182014-12-23T16:04:50.913-06:002014-12-23T16:04:50.913-06:00Perhaps when your friend passed away, so did your ...Perhaps when your friend passed away, so did your friendship with him, the him that he was back then. New people sometimes need new friends. Why beat yourself up over this? Perhaps no friendship is better than a painful one.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com