I just don't know ... I don't know how I'm going to make it through the next two weeks. I am so damned tired.
I slept for ten and a half hours last night. I went to work and felt a little better ... but then it was time for my morning dose ... and I was back where I started. By twelve o'clock, I wanted to curl into a ball. But I stuck it out until twelve thirty ... when I went straight to my car, turned the heater on, and fell asleep for an hour.
This evening, I admitted to Mom that I was thinking of calling the doctor on Monday and telling her I quit ... no more. I know I need medicine but I can't keep on like this. Mom listened ... and then told me no ... to keep pushing. She said in a couple weeks I'll feel so much better ... to just hold on.
So ... I'm going to try. I guess I can sleep in my car each day. I can try taking some Vitamin B12 ... try to up my energy. I'll sleep 10 hours a night. And hopefully at the end of two weeks, I'll be back to my old self.
For the moment, I'm dreading tomorrow. I want to see our friends ... but I don't want to sew ... I don't want to scrapbook ... or sort photos ... or crochet. I sure as heck don't want to cook ... or prep. I don't want to do anything but go to bed right now. And I haven't even taken my evening dose.
Heaven help me ...
What kind of fool am I
(Heaven knows)
Why you take an eye for an eye
(Heaven knows)
What comes over me
You were pumping iron
As I was pumping irony
Robert Plant - Heaven Knows
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