Thursday, March 17, 2005

Alas, Poor Angie, We Barely Knew Ye ...

Curse ye, fates! Or, more appropriately ... rot in hell, you fucking losers! Due to yet another one of Mark Burnet's "clever twists", my favorite Survivor contestant, Angie Jakusz was sent home last night. And before some fucknut writes to tell me she went home months ago ... I'm aware.

Once again, Koror dominated the competition ... but only because Ulong's Ibrehem screwed the proverbial pooch. Oh and he screwed it good. Ulong was ahead by quite a bit and it looked like a win was in the bank for our favorite rag-tag gang of underdogs. But no ... Ibrehem was able to snatch defeat right outta the jaws of victory.

So, as I've said, thanks to Ibrehem's aquatic inaptitude ... and a tribal council twist that was about as subtle as a shovel to the back of the head ... my favorite Survivor was sent packing.

I can't tell you how disgusted I am with the whole show. And yes, I'm aware .. I say that every season. Good people are voted off while others who are a complete waste of sperm and egg are left behind.

Rob and Amber are two good examples. Survivor All-Stars granted us a look at the first million-dollar bootie call ... and I'm amazed that each and every one of the losing contestants didn't throw themselves onto the fire when they saw that those two Darwin rejects were going to win.

And so ... Angie ... good luck in everything you do ... and if there's any type of Karmic balance to the universe ... may a hermit crab pinch Koror's Coby square in the nugget sack.

I step up to the table in the middle of my life
And I take my cards and I check them twice
I've got a killer hand and I'm ready to stake my claim
The cops raid the game

Rick Springfield - It's Always Something

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