An awkward conversation I overheard at the grocery store this morning:
Woman 1 - Jane! Great to see you! How big are those grandkids now?
Woman 2 - Oh. They're fine.
Woman 1 - [Pause] Fine? [Awkward laugh] Okay ...
Woman 2 - [Silence]
Woman 1 - Um ... so ... how old are they now?
Woman 2 - Becky is 8 months and Betty is 16 months.
Woman 1 - Oh, really! That's the same age as my sister's daughter!
Woman 2 - [Grunt]
Woman 1 - You know Melinda, right?
Woman 2 - [Grunt]
Woman 1 - My goodness! Little girls! Aren't they something?
Woman 2 - [Silence]
Woman 1 - I mean ... aren't they just so much fun?
Woman 2 - [Silence]
It took every ounce of willpower I had not to look over the French bread and bagels and say, "Hey, ass! She's not into you. She doesn't want to talk about her grandkids and I'm getting the distinct impression she doesn't want to talk to you at all."
It was at that point I realized that I might be a bit edgy ...
You're as bad as a dog with a bone.
Go away now and leave me be.
Your already annoying me as you can see!
Girls Aloud - Annoying
My favorite conversation piece when talking about kids is how big they are getting.
ReplyDelete"Grown' like weeds, I'm tellin' ya."
Like they would be getting any smaller. Guess it's better than admitting the kid got busted for pot a few weeks ago.
Woman with 3 year old riding in grocery cart walking down condiment isle:
ReplyDeleteKid: Ketchup!
Mom: We don't need ketchup.
Kid: Ketchup!
Mom: I told you honey, we have enough ketchup, we don't need any.
Kid: Ketchup!
Mom: Quiet! Stop saying that!
Kid: [Looking bewildered] No! Catch up with that cart!
I look over my shoulder and sure enough there is another little boy in another cart. To funny!
AZ
So true, Schoo ... nobody ever admits how things are really going. I mean, have you ever heard anyone say:
ReplyDelete"Bob! How's the wife and kids?"
"John! Well, the wife caught VD off the golf pro out at Brookhills ... and my son? Well, he's bullying everybody in the 3rd and the fourth grade! In fact, they say he's bullying at a 6th grade level! How'd I get so damned blessed, Bob?!"
Grow'n like weeds ... heh heh ...
That conversation was hilarious.
ReplyDeleteThirtyWhat, I live in the ghetto and I promise I have heard conversations like Woman1: "Hey, what's up girl?" Woman2:"Well, the Ol man caught VD off some crack head... and my son? Well, he's bullying everybody in the 3rd and the fourth grade! He gonna end up in juvinile if he don't slow down." Not my kind of chit chat but I have heard it.
ReplyDelete