Thursday, November 19, 2009

Just For Today, I Am a Big Baby ...

I'm not doing well today. I know I'm overreacting ... but I can't seem to help it.

It started about a year ago. I had something on my face ... a mole ... a spot ... I don't know. Honestly, it looked like a blood blister. It started off small. It grew. It would occasionally bleed and get smaller ... but then it would get larger again. Sorry ... it's gross, I know.

So today I finally went to the dermatologist and they said it needed to be removed, tested, and the spot cauterized to stop the bleeding. This is no big deal. She didn't think it was cancerous. She just said they needed to test it to be sure there wasn't anything going on with the skin cells.

Well ... between the shot in my cheek to numb the area (wowsa) ... and seeing the razor blade with which she "shaved" the skin off ... and hearing and smelling the cauterizing of the skin afterwards ... I feel absolutely sick.  I'm queasy, my head aches, and my cheek is sore.

I have nothing further to add ... I just wanted to whine and complain. That is all. Carry on.

I'm not afraid
Of anything in this world
There's nothing you can throw at me
That I haven't already heard

I'm just trying to find
A decent melody
A song that I can sing
In my own company

I never thought you were a fool
But darling look at you
You gotta stand up straight
Carry your own weight
These tears are going nowhere baby

You've got to get yourself together
You've got stuck in a moment
And now you can't get out of it

Don't say that later will be better
Now you're stuck in a moment
And you can't get out of it

U2 - Stuck In A Moment