Tuesday, August 30, 2011

One More Thought ...

About six months ago, right around Lent, the Long John Silvers on Sangamon went out of business. Now how the hell a fish shop can go out of business in the middle of Lent is completely beyond me. If you can't make a profit selling fish to Catholics in the month of April, then you're really doing something wrong.

Anyway ... the nearby LJS closed and I haven't had a single peg leg since. At the time, I thought the closing was a positive random happenstance. I'm not the healthiest of individuals and this basically took away a horrifically calorified lunch option. Yay me, right?

Okay, it's been six months now and goddamn it I need some Long John Silvers. I am a junkie sorely in need of a grease-filled fix. The closest one would be on Clocktower Drive ... so it would be relatively cold and soggy by the time I got it home. Also, (my ex-husband) still can't eat breaded or battered items ... too much radiation damage ... so he couldn't partake in this trans-fat orgy with me. Unfortunately, like most other binges, it's always more fun when someone else goes on the lost weekend with you.

So I don't know how I'm going to make this happen ... [shakes fist Scarlet O'Hara style] but at some point ... in some way ... as God as my witness ... there will be a hushpuppy in my future.

Ah, but when that clock strikes midnight
And I'm all by myself
I work that combination on my
secret hideaway shelf
And I pull out some Fritos corn chips
Dr Pepper and an 'ole Moon Pie
Then I sit back in glorious expectation
Of a genuine junk food high
In the daytime I'm Mr Natural
Just as healthy as I can be
Oh, but at night I'm a junk food junkie
Good lord have pity on me

Larry Groce - Junk Food Junkie