Insipid Celebrities - Part Deux

Hey, kids! Once you're done buying a t-shirt from Screech to pay off his house note, we've got an all-new celebrity cause to support!

In the never ending search for credibility, self respect, and public interest, Britney's man pet, Kevin Federline has picked a bandwagon to jump on. What bandwagon is that, you ask? Wait! I know ... aid for Africa with Bono? Third World Debt with Geldoff? Rainforests with Henley?

Oh no ... Johnny Fedderseed is much more "hip" than that. K-Fed has chosen the penny as his cause de'jour. No, I'm not kidding ... God how I wish I were kidding.

It doesn't seem like much of an issue, this whole penny thing. But believe it or not, there's a hot debate going on about whether or not we should do away with our smallest denomination. CNN and Chicago Tribune have even covered the story.

Per CNN, at the center of the argument is the idea that making pennies costs more than the coins are actually worth. "There's no profit whatsoever from making pennies, though the U.S. Mint will probably disagree," said Neena Moorjani, a spokesperson from Kolbe's office.

Sure enough, the U.S. Mint does dispute the claim: It says making each penny costs about 0.81 of a cent, while it collects a whole cent for each one. That makes the Mint's total profit on the penny: about $24 million a year.

So what's the bottom line? Are pennies worth keeping around? In my humble opinion we should've kicked pennies and Kevin Federline to the curb ages ago.

I've got a drawer full of them here at work and they seem to keep multiplying like tribbles ... pennies, I mean ... not Kevin Federline ... although, come to think of it, he does seem to be pretty fertile.

I'm assuming my opinion on the matter isn't the typical sentiment here in Central Illinois, the Land o' Lincoln. But what do I know ... I'm also one of those people who hates Daylight Savings Time.

At the end of the day, my opinion and a dollar will buy you a Mountain Dew at the vending machine down the hall. Coincidentally, the vending machine does not take pennies ...

Penny lover, don't you walk on by
(Don't you walk on by)
Penny lover, don't you make me cry
(Don't you make me cry, baby)

Lionel Richie - Penny Lover