I guess I'll swallow my pride and admit it. When I read that the State Journal-Register had started their own local blogroll, I wanted to be included. Then when I noticed that 11th Hour was one of the first to be listed, I did feel a tiny bit jealous.
But after I logged in this morning and learned that JP's request to be included has been turned down ... or at the very least ignored ... my hopes and aspirations were crushed.
I mean, common ... if JP can't make it onto the SJ-R blogroll, what chance in hell do I have? Blevin feels just as hopeless as I do ... and he curses a lot less than me. And while Palmer is making valid political points ... what am I doing? Making fun of a Lincoln monument.
I considered writing a week's worth of posts that were so clean they'd squeak ... something civic minded and uber-political ... something that might appeal to the powers that be at the SJ-R. But then ... isn't that crux of the whole hot topic?
If I start censoring myself just to be included in this blogroll (or anything else), then I've lost the whole reason to have a blog in the first place ... raw self-expression. If I've had a bad day and want to include the word fuck 14 times in a three paragraph post ... then I want not only to be able to do it ... but to feel comfortable doing it.
All that aside, I'm still a little jealous of Dave ... not just because he's on the blogroll ... but also because he's independent and I'm confident he'll still write whatever he feels like and let the chips fall where they may. I'm just not that confident about me ...
That's me in the spotlight
Losing my religion
Trying to keep up with you
And I don't know if I can do it
Oh no I've said too much
I haven't said enough
REM - Losing My Religion