Monday, January 14, 2013

Oven Doors Aren't Supposed To Come Off ... Are They?

Last night, IdiotsAnonymous hosted the first annual Wibbly Wobbly Timey Wimey Doctor Who Pizza Party Girls Night Out Extravaganza at her new apartment.   Her sister, MiniMoose, and I headed over about four o'clock with a load of furniture and housewares ... and a cherished red envelope containing The Planet of the Dead ... the only Doctor Who movie not available for streaming on Netflix.

She gave me a tour of her new digs ... which, by the way, is very nice.  Two bedrooms ... big living room ... deck ... covered parking ... I love it!    We looked at her collection of coupons and decided on Papa Murphy's Pizza ... after all, she hadn't used her oven yet ... what better time to give it a test run?   We actually had this discussion.  This is what is known as ... foreshadowing ...

We drove down the street to Montvale Plaza and somehow ended up getting an obscene amount of food.  Despite us ordering a family-sized pizza ... and cheesy breadsticks ... and a s'more dessert pizza, I assure you none of us were stoned or pregnant ... just really, really hungry.  And so, with a plentiful bounty of carbohydrates in hand, we ran back to the apartment to get this party started.

Right off the bat, the party hit a few snags.  First the Wii didn't want to recognize the wireless network ... but that's okay ... we fixed it.   Then the TV wouldn't display video from the DVD player ... but that's okay ... we fixed it.   Then the oven was a little wonky to open ... but we got past everything ... and finally the DVD player was going and the pizza was cooking.  From the outside, it seemed like we were on the right track.

Now ... having learned from nearly setting a friend's house on fire on his birthday ... we knew to only put one item in an electric oven at a time.  We were keeping track of the time ... hanging out in the living room setting up her end tables and lamps and trying some of MiniMoose's Eggnog Muffins (I swear, we were not stoned) ... while back in the kitchen, the oven was doing its thing. 

That's when we noticed that it smelled ... hot.   Remember the previous Papa Murphy's experience I referenced?  That hot smell is what comes before the smoking and the charring.   So we headed back to the kitchen to check on dinner.  And that is when all hell broke loose.

As we went to pull out the pizza, the oven door fell off.  It just ... fell off.  Now, the oven is heated to 425 at this point ... so the door is hot.  We can't sit it on the linoleum ... we can't sit it on the carpet ... and we sure as hell can't stand there and hold it for an hour or two.   So IdiotsAnonymous held it up while I found a blanket ... and we laid the oven door "hot side up" on the blanket.  No amount of  messing with the hinges would unlock them ... that door was not going back on.

So ... no cheesy breadsticks.  No s'more's pizza.   But ... we had Doctor Who ... we had pineapple sausage pizza ... we had eggnog muffins ... we had each other ... and we had a good sense of humor.   Some nights that's the best you can ask for ...

Some nights I stay up cashing in my bad luck
Some nights I call it a draw
Some nights I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights I wish they'd just fall off

FUN - Some Nights