Sunday, February 03, 2013

Let's Play a Game!

So, the last week I was hanging out with someone ... and he asked me if something in one of my posts was true.  Unfortunately, it was.  After I got home that night, I tried ... but I can't write about that stuff just yet.  I'm working on it ... but in the meantime, on a lighter note ...

Our conversation did give me an idea.   Let's play a game!

To Tell the Truth - ThirtyWhat Style
So ... I'm going to tell three short stories. Two of these stories are true ... one isn't. Can you spot which one is fiction? Let's find out ...

Story One - When I was a little ThirtyWhat, maybe second or third grade, I had a bad experience. I was going to a Catholic grade school and, for some bizarre reason, we got out early at 2:30 every Wednesday. Well, one Wednesday, I went outside to meet my Mom, who picked me up every day ... and she wasn't there. Instead of going back inside and telling the teacher I needed help, I lied.  I told everyone I was fine ... and sat on the school steps waiting. Everyone left ... the school closed ... and I sat there ... and cried. Right before 3:30, she came pulling up ... in a complete panic. She was beside herself ... "Why didn't you have someone call to remind me?!"   I don't know ... because I'm a kid?  Looking back, it's a wonder I'm as normal as I am ...

Story Two - My first celebrity crush ... was Rick Springfield.  Oh, I had it bad.  When Jesse's Girl came out, it was as if the veil was lifted and I realized ... boys ... are ... cute.  Oh, and I wanted him ... even if I only had a vague idea of what I'd do with him once I got him.  I covered my walls with pictures of him.  I bought every album he released.  I bought every copy of Tiger Beat that so much as mentioned his name.  If puberty had a name ... it would be Rick.  It truly was ridiculous.  I hung on for several years ... until right around the time I got my first kiss.   Hey, I'm nothing if not loyal ... but eventually I figured out that no matter how good my imagination might be ... the real thing was a lot more fun.

Story Three - One time, when I was around sixteen, my parents took me down to visit my brother in Tennessee.  I think he was on wife number three at the time ... and had a farm with livestock and horses.   He asked if I wanted to go ride up on the ridge with him to check on the cattle ... and I said sure.  He gave me a beautiful cream-colored mare to ride.  Her name was Star and she was sweet and gentle.  As we started up the ridge, he told me to hold tight and pull on the reins to slow her down.  We went to the top, looked around, and started back down a short while later.  But his property was hilly ... and the horse started picking up speed.  I tried to pull back ... but she only went faster.  I was terrified and leaned forward to grab a hold of her neck ... and, of course, fell off.   Tennessee ground is hard and rocky ... my shirt was ripped open ... I hit my head on something and was bruised and bleeding ... hell, I was lucky the horse didn't step on me and kill me.  But what did my darling brother do?  He walked up ... started laughing ... and said ... "Damn, that was stupid."  For anyone who asks why we snipe at each other ... this sort of shit right here is why.

Okay ... there are your three choices.  How well do you know ThirtyWhat??
I bought a ticket to the world,
But now I've come back again
Why do I find it hard to write the next line?
Oh I want the truth to be said
Huh huh huh hu-uh huh
I know this much is true
Huh huh huh hu-uh huh
I know this much is true.
Spandau Ballet - True