Monday, February 18, 2013

Rock Paper Scissors Lizard Spock ...

So ... the cherry on top of the sundae of my life that consists of a) living in a construction zone and b) having a raging headache which is the result of both sleep deprivation and Cherry Coke withdrawal ... the phone rang this morning to remind me of my cardiologist's appointment Thursday afternoon.
So ... the time for a decision is at hand.  I've been considering this for two or three weeks now.  I didn't tell Mom ... because she'd just freak out and I needed time to ... think.  Barnes in St. Louis wants my cardiologist to run a test.  They say they need better images of the hole in my heart ... to decide whether or not they can close it.

Now, I don't know how they'll do it here in Springfield ... but in Florida, the test consists of drinking several shots of a viscus, numbing fluid ... then being knocked out ... while a tube is stuck down your throat.  It isn't ... pleasant.

And so the question is ... should I do this test?   If I agree to it ... I run up medical bills ... and if they decide not to do anything, then I'll be paying hundreds of dollars for nothing.  The flip side of this issue is that I agree to it ... and if the hole is big enough, they close it ... and I not only only pay more medical bills ... but I'll have to go to St. Louis to have it closed.  There is no win in any of this.
The other choice, of course, is to pass.  To not do anything.  To keep taking the blood thinners ... and hope not to have another stroke.  Like I said ... there's no win.
I have until Thursday to decide which is the lesser of three evils ...

... and I do love Jesus ... but I really wish I could have a Cherry Coke right about now ...
You can choose a ready guide
In some celestial voice
If you choose not to decide
You still have made a choice
You can choose from phantom fears
And kindness that can kill
I will choose a path that's clear
I will choose freewill
Rush - Free Will