So I went to lunch today ... yes, yet another work luncheon. I swear every 48 hours we're either welcoming someone or telling someone goodbye. As if my job isn't fucking depressing enough as it is. But I digress ...
We went to D'Arcy's and ... come to find out ... some sort of basketball was playing on their televisions. Now, my only real connection to March Madness has been, as I told you guys yesterday, that we could never take the twins to Damons for their birthday because the place was full of basketball guys. Well, today at lunch ... my table ... was full of basketball guys.
Although everyone with a penis was enthralled by the game going on in front of them ... we all had a great time laughing and joking ... and occasionally I would ask my co-worker, Greg, questions ...
"So, who's playing?"
"Illinois and Minnesota"
"Huh? Really? Who's Illinois?"
"They're in the white."
"Why aren't they in orange? Isn't that their thing?"
"They're the home team."
"Oh, so they're in Campaign?"
"No, this is in Chicago."
"Then they should be wearing orange, right?"
"Are they done yet?"
"But everyone's leaving the field ..."
" ... it's a court ..."
"... fine ... everyone's leaving the court."
"It's a time out."
"Are we winning?"
"Illinois, of course ..."
"Well, the game isn't over yet ... but they're ahead ..."
"That's cool ... ... ... I wish they were wearing orange."
"Of course you do ..."
Greg is very patient with me. He is the one who usually fields any sports related questions I may have. He's also the one who explained seasons to me ... when I unsuccessfully tried to buy baseball tickets as a birthday gift in late-December. He's the brother I don't have. Okay, yes ... I have a brother ... but there's no way in hell I'd ask him any of this stuff cause he'd give me shit about it forever.
Greg was actually talking about taking the afternoon off to see "his team" play ... but then he found out they don't play until nine o'clock tonight. The game starts at nine o'clock? I can't lie, I'm stumped. Is this like The Hunger Games meets basketball? They play 24/7 for weeks until there's one team left standing? The rest of the teams have been shot or stabbed or maimed out on the field ... wait ... court? Cause ... that would be kinda cool. I might watch that.
I'll admit it ... this is out of my range of knowledge. For my entire life, that orange "sports" pie in Trivial Pursuit has been my enemy. I fucking hate that orange piece ...
Oh, put me in, Coach I'm ready to play today;
Put me in, Coach
I'm ready to play today;
Look at me, I can be Centerfield.
John Fogerty - Centerfield