Friday, July 19, 2013

Friday Five: Bureaucracy

Somebody put this on a calendar ... I'm doing Friday 5 on a Friday.  Woot!

Tonight is family night.  It's odd because I was so nervous about Stoney meeting the family that I was a nervous wreck.  Now I'm fine with all that ... but I'm a nervous wreck about meeting his family.  At some point we'll have met everybody and I won't be nervous anymore, right?  Maybe?  At some point?  In the distant future?  I'm keeping my fingers crossed!    

The Friday 5 

1.  The last time your answer was “No,” what was the question? - "Do you want some apple pie?"   No. Because as good as it looked and as much as I appreciated the effort, I could not force myself to swallow another bite of apple pie.  No. Just no.  SO much no, in fact, that I went out and bought a cherry pie just so I could go home last night and have a piece of pie that wasn't apple.  Yes ... I have issues.

2.  What’s a rule in your life that just doesn’t make any sense? - I live by myself ... so as far as my home life goes, there aren't any rules unless I make them.  I guess the only rule I made for myself was a year or so ago.  I told myself I wasn't going to trust anyone ever again ... I was going to be distant ... I wasn't ever going to be all soft and sentimental and girly.  And God knows I tried ... for the longest time.  But I give up.  I listen to Christopher Cross now ... and Goddamn Lonely Love ... and all sorts of sugary crap ... and I can't help it and don't you judge me.

3.  What were the professional or personal circumstances surrounding your last passing of the buck? - Last year, my agency introduced a new payroll system for field employees.  It's a computer based program that I knew, eventually, I would be required to support.  Two of us asked to attend the training courses ... just so we would have a good foundation on how the system worked.  The team leader turned us down.  We were told the system didn't affect us and, therefore, we didn't need training.  Sure enough ... six months later, the system rolled out ... and the questions started rolling in.  I directed everything to the team leader.  It's now a year later I still get phone calls on an almost daily basis asking me how about errors or how to sign in ... and I still forward those calls to the team leader.  He hasn't acknowledged his short-sightedness ... and I keep forwarding calls.  I can do this all day long ...

4.  What’s an annoying bit of paperwork you have to do with some regularity? - Once a month I have to walk through the office running a scan ... then submit a report that lists all wireless networks in range.  This is, hands down, the most useless report on the planet.  I'm in a secure building.  I'm the only IT person here.  The scans have been identical for the last three or four years.  Trust me when I tell you no one I work with is going to bring a Linksys router from home and configure a wireless network on their break.  And if they do?  Kudos for you man ... way to show initiative! 

5.  In some places, employees are entitled to regular smoking breaks. Whether you smoke or not, what would be another thing you’d love to take a fifteen-minute break for, every few hours? - Hahaha ... come on now!  What does every red blooded American want to do for fifteen minutes every few hours?  Exactly!  Naps!  And if we can't have hourly naps ... I guess we'll have to masturbate.

Kidding!  We totally want naps ... ... as far as you know.

I hate these blurred lines
I know you want it
I know you want it
I know you want it
But you're a good girl
The way you grab me
Must wanna get nasty
Go ahead, get at me

Robin Thicke - Blurred Lines

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