Friday, July 05, 2013

The One With All the Answers ...

I guess I'll post twice today ... something happier later ... but for now just to get this out of my head.

So ... for the first time ... the reality of my friend's death hit me today.  Something came up ... something trivial and stupid.  It bothered me a little bit ... and my first thought was to pick up my phone and text her.  The cell phone was actually in my hands when it hit me that she was gone.  It was the emptiest, loneliest feeling in the world.

I have special people in my life that I care about and that I love ... but she was different.  She was my best friend ... the sister who would listen to all my trivial bullshit problems and tell me it's all gonna be okay.   She had this unique way of listening ... and then offering her thoughts on what was going on.  By the end of the conversation, she'd have me laughing.

I'm trying not to be morose on here ... or in real life.  I try not to bring her up all the time ... not to mention her in every conversation but it slips out now and then.  Today is Friday ... and normally, if neither of us had anything going on, she would call me tonight and spend a good three hours on the phone with me ... complaining to me about her work or talking about her life in general.  Tonight, I'm going to miss her call ...

Operator, well, let's forget about this call
There's no one there I really wanted to talk to
Thank you for your time
Oh, you've been so much more than kind
You can keep the dime

Jim Croce - Operator

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